On Celebration: Big and Small

Collecting glimmers and fleeting moments of joy

(image from Pinterest)

When I was in my twenties, a friend’s mum invited a group of us to her sixtieth birthday party. To this day, it remains the most impressive, extravagant celebration of life I’ve ever attended. The attention to detail surpassed any wedding – there were multiple food trucks, live music, and long tables set beneath an enormous sailcloth tent. My friend’s mum titled the celebration Wendifest – a gloriously self-indulgent festival for friends and friends-of-friends of all ages.

At some point in the afternoon, she gave a speech where she shared things she’d learned in her sixty years of life. There’s one part I’ve never forgotten. She told us to celebrate everything – big and small. I loved it.

Dream celebration cake by @vegemammma

I think I’d spent most of my life, as so many of us do, slaving away to reach a goal or meet an expectation, only to achieve it and immediately move on – neglecting to acknowledge the effort, the grit, the time, and the sacrifice it took to get there. Then, in other times – when I’ve been unwell – I’ve almost berated myself for feeling proud of accomplishing small tasks that felt extremely difficult. Like hanging out the washing. Or cooking dinner that wasn’t just toast.

I felt as though it wasn’t worthy of a celebration, because I should just be able to do the basics without it being a struggle.

This week, I received the grade for my final Master’s project. I’ve spent the past year working on a series of personal essays as part of my creative thesis – a kind of cultural critique or social commentary on addiction, illness, recovery, and resistance. I got an A+.

And no, grades aren’t everything. But I felt good about this. I felt proud of myself – and encouraged to keep going, to keep developing the project and pitch it to publishers. I also plan to go on multiple celebratory dinners and graciously accept graduation gifts.

Solo writing trip in Ubud to finish my thesis.

I remember something a friend once told me during a depressive episode, when I’d gone into respite care. She’s a clinical psychologist and had made me laugh – I think I said it was the first time I’d smiled in a while. She told me about glimmers. Glimmers are “tiny micro moments of joy – fleeting, everyday experiences that spark a sense of happiness and gratitude.” She told me to hold onto them, because the more I collected, the better my outlook would become.

Celebrating all the big and little things is a very fun way to live life. I make the bed – and celebrate. I do a proper supermarket shop – and celebrate. I get a decent night’s sleep and wake up after 4am – and I really celebrate.

I suppose it’s a bit like making a gratitude list, only it involves a pat on the back, a treat and/or fancy dinner.

So if you’re reading this, I hope you find a reason to celebrate today – alone or with others. I’m going to celebrate by watching a crime documentary next to the cat, because it’s cold and raining outside.

Lots of love,
Char